“Whoever exalts himself will be humbled, and the one who humbles himself will be exalted.” (Lk 18:14)
The publican shows the way to enter the humility of Christ. He stands with head bowed at the summit of Benedict’s Steps of Humility, full of truth, empty of fear, ready for the gift of perfect love.
“Lord, I am a sinner, not worthy to look up to heaven.” (RB 7; Lk 18:13-14, Mt 8:8)
A passionate love of Christ implies a passionate desire for his humility, the chief expression of which is obedience. This is not about humility in the abstract – a thoroughly unattractive proposition. It is the humility of Christ that matters, that we are invited to enter, to dwell in and be infused by until there is “no longer I, but Christ dwells in me” (Gal 2:20).
“Learn from me, for I am gentle and humble of heart.” (Mt 11:29)
Humility says: “Not what I want, but what you want” (Mk 14:36). It says this not to God alone, but to Christ in my sister who holds a position of authority, to Christ in my sister who is in need, to Christ in my sister who is annoying. This is not an abandonment of my own authority, nor of my capacity of adult decision-making and discernment. It is rather a burning desire to choose Christ in all situations, rather than my own will, my own convenience, my own comfort.
“I regard everything as loss because of the surpassing value of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord. For his sake I have suffered the loss of all things and I regard them as rubbish, in order that I may gain Christ and be found in him…. I want to know Christ and the power of his resurrection and the sharing of his sufferings by becoming like him in his death, if somehow I may attain the resurrection of the dead” (Phil 3:8-9, 10-11).
Humility is everything. It is worth the loss of everything. It is worth being like a sheep for slaughter or a brute beast or a worm in our own eyes and in the eyes of others, because by it we draw near to the beloved and become like him. Humility is not ordered to death, but to life. It may feel like death, because we are not greater than he who “learned obedience through what he suffered” (Heb 5:8). The power of Christ’s resurrection is made perfect in weakness.
“The only wisdom we can hope to acquire. Is the wisdom of humility: humility is endless.” (T.S. Eliot, Four Quartets)